Last night, Darlene and I had something of a movie date on the back porch:  we watched a DVD of Finian’s Rainbow.  Today’s blog is not intended as a film review, so I will not report the rude, disparaging remarks we enjoyed making as we watched this lame excuse for a musical.  However, one of the songs clearly illustrated something that I have often said:

All men are pigs.

I could talk about the total depravity of mankind, and the decline of modern culture, and the technological temptations facing males today, but I won’t.  The fact is, since ancient times men have chased anything with two X chromosomes.  As Tommy Steele sang, “When I’m not near the girl I loves, I loves the girl I’m near,” and “If they has bosoms, I woos ems.”  Bad grammar aside, it’s a good rotten social commentary.

I used to have a student who disagreed with my assessment, and protested that her dad was NOT a pig; I told her to go home and ask her father.  She came back and reported that he agreed with me, but she could not accept it:  she would rather see her father as a liar than a pig.  I truly admired her naivete.

So is there any hope for humanity?  Of course:

  • Men may BE pigs, but they don’t have to act like them.  I understand that some even make good house pets; and
  • Women looking for a husband need to accept the fact that all men are pigs, and just try to pick the cleanest one they can find.

Oink.