My friends and family know that I have dealt for some time with depression and anxiety.  I have a hormonal imbalance that contributes to the situation, and I have been on and off medications as needed to help me deal with the physical and emotional effects.  Recently, the disappointments and pressures of various situations hit me hard, and a side effect of the medicine made my response progressively worse.  With the support of my family, I checked into the hospital and spent a week on the psych ward.  I am currently at home on disability, adjusting to new medicines and receiving therapy to improve my ability to cope with this disease called mental illness.  I ask for your prayers and your understanding as the Lord, the doctors, and I travel what could be a long path to full recovery.

And yes, this blog is therapy–a way to reach people without being around too many people until I am able to handle it.  Your “hits” on the site and your comments–positive or negative–affirm to me that I still have something that people are willing to listen to.

Some day soon I will begin publishing some character sketches–fictionalized snapshots inspired by people I met in the hospital.  Watch for them in the “Readers’ Corner” and know that each character is me, and that each situation is real.

To all my fellow sufferers, let me remind you what the prophet Jeremiah said in Lamentations 3:19-21 (freely paraphrased):  If God knows and remembers all my struggles (and He does), then even when I am overwhelmed by the knowledge of them and sink to the lowest pit of despair, I know He is still there, and that gives me hope.

This morning for the first time in a very long time, I woke up and I had a sense of His pulse in the hand He holds me in.  There is hope.

Even when the ship of my life
Has crashed on the rocks of hopelessness,
And there is nothing left
But the rocks and the waves,
He is the rock
And He controls the waves.

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